Happens to me all the time. I hate myself for doing it. I can tell you 5 incidents in the past week.
My dilemma
The pain that I am in is making me on edge. Feeling empty yet extremely angry. Getting my hopes up just to be distorted is always happening to me. My car is costing me more money than I have and my feelings tworge her is seaming to make me week. I will do anything fort her just to make her smile, yet the Q of “would you die for her?” is in my mind. The answer should be know, yet my answer for her is yes. I would kill my self for her if I knew it would keep her happy. I know that she loves me like I love her, yet as of right now she seams to be going threw something that is bugging me to no end, just because she is empty inside. I can’t stand the thought of loosing Any of my friends or loved ones but if they lost me they might be better off. I’m not good for anyone anymore. If going away make it so she can find happiness agen I would. The heart that is torn by two, yet I have more of it. Maybe I should just get out of her life, even though it will almost kill us both or will kill us both, so she can be with the other and not have a distraction in her life anymore. Work is taking a tole on me as well just because of the shit that I put up with to keep my employers happy. Maybe I should just give up on life like how everyone sees me doing. Maybe I should be the experiment to make me normal then just disaper afterwords. It’ll make people happy excepted for like two of us.
